If you don’t ask, you don’t get…

"Where is it written that you have to wear a superhero cape ALL the time?"
(Adrienne Phelps)

Do you have a hard time asking for help? Do you find unfinished projects scattered through your life?

We live in a world that often treats asking for help as a sign of weakness. We're praised for doing things on our own—pushing through, figuring it out, not needing anyone. Independence is rewarded and vulnerability, well, not so much.

Last month, my 17-year-old daughter scraped the side of our single-bay garage with her vehicle. She’s still new to driving, and maneuvering a hand-me-down, oversized mom car into a tight space would challenge even a seasoned driver.

She was rattled and upset—but she did something powerful: She asked for help.

Even though it meant admitting a mistake.
Even though it risked looking inexperienced.
Even though her pride took a hit.

She sent up a quiet SOS and asked for my help. She allowed herself to receive support.

This isn’t a “look how great of a mom I am” story. It’s a moment that reminded me how much courage it takes to ask for help—especially when you’re feeling unsure, embarrassed, or overwhelmed.

Back in my corporate days, whenever I had a tech issue, I’d spend way too long trying to fix it myself. I didn’t want to call IT just to be asked, “Did you restart it?” or “Is it plugged in?” I hated the thought anyone would think I just fell off the turnip truck, so that fear of seeming incompetent kept me stuck—wasting time, energy, and momentum.

And it wasn’t just tech problems. I avoided asking for help in bigger areas, too. At work, home and life. I’d struggle alone rather than risk looking like I didn’t know what I was doing.

But here’s the hard truth: That kind of pride comes at a cost.

When we resist help, we don’t just delay progress—we sometimes derail it altogether. We miss opportunities, stall dreams, and end up with regrets that quietly erode the contentment and joy of the present.

So… what’s the real harm in asking for help?

Will someone think less of you? Maybe. But what if they don’t?
And more importantly—what if getting the help you need gives you back time, peace, and purpose?

Help isn’t a weakness. It’s a resource and choosing to use it is a form of wisdom.